Woke Jargon Watch--University of Southern California Edition: Normalizing Queerness Via “Yassification”

So, who starts culture wars? The left, usually. To be specific, the vanguard of the culture wars at this point is the transgenderist movement, which excels at making massive social change seem just a bit of harmless fun on college campuses and it loves embracing new terms. Our word for today is, “yassification.”

Not familiar with the term? I was not either until I came across it the other day in an opinion piece in the Daily Trojan, the student newspaper at the University of Southern California.

The author of the March 24, 2022 article entitled, Yassify your friends before it’s too late tells us that it means to make something “heteronormative” into something “gayer” (i.e. friendly to whose who call themselves queer) and enthuses:

one thing is for sure — to yassify something is to improve it

Really. So, if you have a daughter and are thinking of sending her to USC, the student newspaper thinks that it would be great if she returned home as a confirmed lesbian. Just so you know. After all, as the writer warns us:

Simply put, the world is changing, and I fear that those who remain un-yassified may be left behind.

Oh, no—the horror of being left behind. If we remain stubbornly heterosexual, we will miss out on the brave new world of utter decadence. Thank goodness that college campuses are becoming playgrounds for sexual experimentation instead of stodgy places where people once went to be educated.

And how do these noble queers who have the best interests of their non-queer peers at heart go about yassifying them? The writer suggests taking them to raunchy movies, engaging in lots of drinking and buying a lot of bling. On this last point, we are assured:

With style comes yassification…

A key part of yassification is the cultivation of a love of the arts. Take music. The writer tells his fellow yassifiers:

Over time, recommend your friends new songs that become increasingly chaotic and queer.

This is university life at its finest.

To those who say that social conservatives (or, indeed, just non-queer people in general) are just fuddy-duddies who face the ghastly fate of being left behind and that we are alarmists who need to lighten up and stop being bigots, I will leave you with the words of this yassifier and let you judge for yourself the situation facing those who are not eager to be dragged into the queering of America:

Yassification, albeit appearing light-hearted and mindless at its surface, is a powerful tool the LGBTQIA community can use to normalize queerness. The trend brings queer trends to the table in a digestible way — straight, cisgender people will likely react more openmindedly to jokingly being told they are being “yassified” than they would to adopting queer cultural attributes.

USC, like most historic institutions, has a predominantly straight, cisgender and white population. It can be difficult to drift away from heteronormative ideals without a tool like yassification. Hopefully, the above simple tips will help you effectively yassify your friends and loved ones. So far, they have helped me curate a much gayer and more girlboss social circle — and I have felt all the more fulfilled.

This is the kind of thing being published in the college newspapers of fairly well-known American universities right now. The young people who are waging war on “heteronormative ideals” are placed to become the cultural and political leaders of the nation in years to come. It is time to push back and say, “I don’t want to be yassified—thanks all the same.”

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